Dylan Matthews - Vox.comDylan Matthews is the personification of Obama-land’s pajama boy, a privileged weenie whose daily struggle is deciding between a Starbucks caramel macchiato and dolce latte. He worked for the Obama campaign (oh, get out!) and skipped over to several “journalism” jobs after graduating from Harvard.

Now a writer for White House favorite Vox.com, he opines on heady topics and lectures the great unwashed on how his revered leader is officially among the most consequential presidents in history to the declining value of the U.S. Constitution and  Senate (he says both need to go) and now saying that the “American revolution was a mistake.

Young Dylan has it all figured out: Monarchy is superior to our representative democracy (calling King Barack)? Had we remained under British rule, slavery would’ve been abolished sooner and Native Americans would’ve been spared from atrocities. Cue white privilege:

“The main benefit of the revolution to colonists was that it gave more political power to America’s white male minority. For the vast majority of the country — its women, slaves, American Indians — the difference between disenfranchisement in an independent America and disenfranchisement in a British-controlled colonial America was negligible.” he writes. “If anything, the latter would’ve been preferable, since at least women and minorities wouldn’t be singled out for disenfranchisement. From the vantage point of most of the country, who cares if white men had to suffer through what everyone else did for a while longer, especially if them doing so meant slaves gained decades of free life?”

Of course, like many swaddled elitists, he cites academic studies to back up his breathtakingly inane thesis.

But don’t take it from me. Read for yourself and have a good laugh while grilling burgers and enjoying fireworks this 4th of July weekend.

Vox and Obama can have him. And his bow tie.